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Mr. Butter Coffee Freeze (Iced fatCoffee)

Have I mentioned how hot it is in Philadelphia in the summertime? You know how they say, out in Arizona and other parts of the American West, that it’s “a dry heat”? So, like, it’s a 120˚, but it’s “dry.” Supposedly that makes it better, easier to tolerate; they don’t tell you that it’s “a dry heat, so dry that the air actually sucks the moisture directly out of your organs, and within 5 minutes you’ve shriveled into a hollowed-out husk of a person, like that guy in Indiana Jones who ‘chose… poorly‘.”

Philadelphia is not dry in the summer. It’s hot. And humid. And swampy, sweltering… sultry. So hot and dank that when you sweat, the sweat goes inward, where it’s cooler.

All of which is to say: iced is nice. “Italian ice” or “wooter ice” in the local patois, is one common respite from the insufferable heat – if you’ve enjoyed a Rita’s anywhere in the US this year, you can thank Philadelphia for that. You’re probably also still recovering from the insulin shock, but at least you’re looking in the right place for a replacement.

Making an Iced fatCoffee has long been a mission of mine… I don’t really want to stop drinking butter coffee just because the Real Feel is 104˚ and rising. But there have been some challenges, namely: coconut oil. This rather interesting drupe boasts many fascinating attributes, one of which is: it’s solid at room temperature. So while fatCoffee might be liquid at 85˚, when you put it into a glass of iced coffee, you get a solid chunk of coconut oil floating to the top.

Thankfully, the Ninja Goat has some Ninja Friends, and one of them has agreed to help out.

Ingredients

  • 2 packets of fatCoffee®
  • 2 tablespoons of powdered coconut milk (don’t substitute canned coconut milk. You want the powdered stuff because of it’s ability to help everything else emulsify.)
  • 1 cup of ice cubes
  • 8-10 fl oz coffee
  • One extremely powerful blender, like this one.

Preparation

  • Add all ingredients to a blender or small
  • Close lid securely, and blend on high for 45-60 seconds
  • Pour into a tall glass and enjoy

Initially, you will notice an effect not unlike the way Guinness bubbles go downward. This is normal.

Eventually, about half way through your Iced fatCoffee, you will notice a general sense of well being and acceptance of the Universe. This is also normal.

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